First of all I'd like to say that D A M N I love sex :D Like, a lot. And right now I have the perfect sex partner (it's a long story...) who just totally rocks my world. And, I feel like this is something that everyone who wants to experience sex should be able to experience: consensual, sweaty, mind-blowing sex. Yummmmm.
I've been dwelling on the idea of sex, specifically sex ed, a lot lately because I plan on having The Talk with my younger sister this weekend. My parents only really got as far as menstruation (and lemme tell ya the details were sketchy at best) with my older sister and I, and I feel this did us both a great disservice. And as if that wasn't bad enough, they pressured us to opt out of taking sex ed in middle school (sigh, yes my family is Baptist). For me, this left a gaping dearth of information that was promptly filled with the worst that the media, my friends, and my imagination could dream up. Not cool. I'm a firm believer that education empowers youth to make smarter, healthier, better-informed decisions... or at the very least gives them the opportunity to do so. My intention is to sit her down and give her the facts as best I can, try to create a dialogue where she feels comfortable asking questions, and give her some resources that she can utilize when I'm not around. I'm going to attempt to cover as much as I can, including but not limited to: puberty, sex in all its various forms, reproduction, consent, and sexual assault. It's probably gonna be awkward, but I do NOT want my younger siblings falling into the same traps that I did when I started experimenting with sex! Not understanding how my body, or my partner's body, worked. Feelings of shame about being "slutty." Feeling pressured or unable to say "no." Getting fucked over by "hook-up culture" when I really just want a relationship. The list goes on...
In case you're wondering, YES I have been prodding my mom to have the sex talk with my sis for months now, however she's absolutely convinced that 1. my sister isn't curious about sex or puberty yet (couldn't be farther from the truth! little sis has been skirting around the issue with me for a year now), and 2. that it will just put naughty ideas in her head. I beg to differ. I haven't decided whether or not this is crossing some sort of parental line by giving my sis the basic information she needs to take care of herself sexually, but here goes nothing... TO BE CONTINUED!!! *dramatic music*
UPDATE: Ok so things didn't go quite as planned, I was pretty exhausted from caring for the kids all day and by the time the little ones were in bed my sis and I just kind of zonked out in front of the TV. Besides my exhaustion, I realized that my parents' home just doesn't feel like a safe space to have The Talk. There's a lot of loaded history in that house, and besides there is always the risk that the little ones would barge in on our private convo (I'm not opposed to them overhearing about sex but I think my sis would have felt like "omg WHY are we having this talk in a shared space??!!" Because I sure felt that way.) It wasn't a total loss though, I turned on Will & Grace and we watched it together, which prompted her to ask all kinds of questions about the gay characters on the show. Also, a birth control ad came on and I was totally able to explain to her how it worked. I'm gonna try to use this as more proof that my mom should REALLY have the sex talk with her now, but if she still balks then I'll try again later.
What an asshole.
1 hour ago